Becoming One With Russia
by whoevenISthis
Summary: This is a *cough* fail *cough* attempt at turning a roleplay that I did with my friends into a Hetalia fanfiction.


Hey everyone! This is a fanfiction about my Hetalia OTP, Russia X China! It is adapted from a roleplay that my friend and I had, so I apologize if there is not much action, but more words.

This whole crazy story began on a regular day. Or, at least, as regular as a day can be for countries…

Greenland was failing at imitating America. "Yo dude!" she yelled.

"No! I am the one and only America!"

China walked in.

"Hey China!" America yelled.

"ugh, hello Alfred aru…" China mumbled back.

England walked in and greeted America.

For some unknown reason, China randomly said, "You are a really stupid bai chi, Alfred aru."

"What's bai chi mean China? And I'm not stupid, just misunderstood!"

"Do you admit that you are a bai chi aru?"

"I can't admit it if I don't know what it is!" America angerly spat.

"Uh…. It means, uh, super smart dude. Yeah that's it aru…."

"Ughhhhhh! That wanker Prussia is annoying as hell right now!" England complained.

China laughed at him. "Deal with it. By that, I mean kill him aru."

England thought for a second, then replied, "Good idea, want to help out China?"

America, being the idiot he is, said, "Okay! I'll go get him then!"

He then left and soon returned, dragging Prussia in after him.

'Oh god!' England thought.

"KESESESESE! America, you said I was needed," Prussia annoying stated.

"Yeah dude! I don't know, England said your name so I felt like getting awesomeness."

"Pfft! Hell yeah I'm awesomeness!" Prussia yelled.

"Sure you are…." Said England

China 'agreed' with England.

"... England. You're a pervert, by the way," randomly said Prussia, "I'm awesome!"

"How am I the pervert!" exclaimed England.

"Shut up! You're just jealous of my awesomeness! You are a pervert because you read Eros!" yelled Prussia.

"SHUT YOUR WANKER MOUTH!"

"HAHHAHAHA Dudes this is crazy!"

"WHOS THE PERVERT NOW?"

England yelled, "YOU!"

"Still you aru."

"KESESESSE! Hey Greenland"

Oh my god! Russia's here" said England.

" AH! RUSSIA aru!"

Russia walked over to China. "Become One, da?"

"Not today aru!" China yelled while attempting to run, but tripping. "Iggy, help me aru!"

England blocked China from Russia. "Bad Russia! GO bug the Baltics!"

Russia seemed to think about that for a moment.

"Hmmm no, da."

China began to attempt to sneak away, when Belarus suddenly jumped out of nowhere.

"Nii-san! Let's get married!" she yelled.

Russia then ran away faster than anyone ever thought he could.

"Kesesese"

"What Prussia?" Greenland questioned.

"See China? The Hero makes everything better!"

"You did not help at all you bai chi aru. It was Belarus who got rid of Russia."

"America! Your voice is hurting my head!" said England

"Iggy, those were exactly my thoughts aru," replied China.

"Your non-English voice is hurting my head England!" yelled America, obnoxiously.

"Shut up wanker!"

"Wait…. England is English, America is American! Alred, you are such an idiot aru!"

"NOOOO! My speech is English!" screamed America, "England's is Englandish!"

"No, I repeat you speak American, England speaks English aru!"

"Yeah!" agreed England.

"I'm too awesome to be here, but you need SOMETHING worth living for here huh? Kesesesese" said Prussia, who was still ignored.

China said you're welcome to England and ended the conversation.

Prussia then decided everyone except for Greenland is a moron.

"Kesesesese"

"Oh My God! France set my stove on fire!"

"Francu?" Ireland questioned

China then passed out from the stupidity of the situation.

Greenland asked Prussia, "Why do you always laugh like that and what is a Francu!"

America grabbed a marker to draw on China's face.

"Yeah, really Ireland," said England.

"America, is it? That is really immature, drawing on someone's face." Stated the newcomer, Israel.

"Francu is France you nuggets," Ireland pointed out as though everyone should know that.

"But it's fun!" complained America

"IMMATURE!" shouted Israel

"We need the rest of the bad friends trio to make this awesomer" randomly said Prussia. (A/N: Wait, he's still there? Sorry if it gets confusing, there are two conversations going on)

"Not immature, fun!"

"Why?" Greenland asked.

"England, is it? Can you back me up?" Israel questioned.

"Yeah sure" England agreed

"Because the bad friends trio are almost as awesome as me! Kesesesesesese!"

"But they always seem like they're going to rape me" Greenland said.

"Wait I know someone better than Spain and France!" she continued

"Is it me!" Israel said excited

Austria walked in.

Ireland hit America over the head with her shoe gun because she knew that America would not be persuaded to not draw on China's face.

America passed out.

"How's that?" she questioned.

Israel was surprised.

"Pfft! That aristocrat!" Prussia yelled.

"Hello," Austria stated, not paying attention to any of the random craziness.

"When America is passed out, it is much better in my opinion." Said Israel.

"What's up with all these bloody countries coming!" yelled England.

"GET HIM OUT!" exclaimed Prussia.

China woke up.

"Eh? What happened aru?"

"HaHa! China, while you were passed out, Austria came, and America got knocked out because I hit him with my shoe gun," Ireland said simply.

China was still groggy, so he didn't register all of that information at once.

Austria gave Prussia the finger and told him to screw off.

"Okay then aru..."

"Hey Austria aru?"

Prussia gives Austria the finger, "Back at you."

Prussia excused himself to go walk the dog.

"You have a dog now Prussia! Oh yeah, that's right, Germany's dog," Greenland exclaimed.

I am so glad Russia did not come back while I was passed out aru."

" I'm so confused. Maybe I should leave?" Israel asked.

"No no stay," insisted England, "it's always like this"

"Uh... okay..." nervously replied Israel.

The second after, America woke up and asked what happened, much like China.

"I'm glad that America woke up. I don't like anyone else here," Ireland pointed out.

"Brat" replied Greenland.

"Kesesesesesesese."

"I'm not a brat. I'm just shy...and i don't trust you anymore," Ireland stated matter-of-factly.

"Hmmm….. I wonder why?" sarcastically asked Greenland.

"Because you shot me!" Ireland angrily spat back.

"Youe sheep almost killed my boyfriend!" Greenland yelled.

Russia came back.

"Ah! He's back aru!"

"Become one with Mother Russia Da?"

"Uh…"

"I-I guess Russia. I know I I'll regret this, but okay aru."

"KESESEESESESESESE!"

"What?" Greenland yelled.

"I am still here..." Israel pointed out.

"Gilbert calm down your voice is giving me a headache," Austria pointlessly said.

"You're not ignored. I, for one, just prefer my Italian friends and I have trust issues." Ireland said smiling as if it was no big deal that Israel was being forgotten. (A/N: My friend who was roleplaying as Ireland typed frieds instead of friends!)

"Oh okay." He replied.

"Well Austria, your piano is giving me a headache, I'm actually probably calming your head," stupidly said Prussia.

"You are not." Austria replied.

"Pianos are nice!" Israel complained to Prussia.

Well, our roleplay that day ended there because one of us had to go to CCD. So that is why the chapter ends on a sort-of cliffhanger. Deal with it. There is more done, I just have to convert it from roleplay form to fanfiction form. Thank you for reading this failed attempt at turning a roleplay into fanfiction.


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